Hmm...so some bs happen to me over this weekend. I don't know if I should be mad about it or not..
On Friday night I was with a group of friends and we ate out. Then someone dropped off two people while me and my friend walked with another person back to her apartment. Then the guy who dropped off two people came back. I was sitting with my friend while those two people went up to the apartment. Then the guy that dropped off those two people texted my friend, and I read it. It said something like, go home and when Austin goes home, come back. VP ORDERS. So I was like, wow. Not because it was like ditching me, but because they had to be kids, go behind my back, and "ditch" me. That shyt happened in freakin fifth grade and we in college. If they could say it straight up to my face, it'd be cool. But naw. My friend felt really bad and I wasn't mad at him, but I didn't know what to do cause it was the first time that happened to me. So I kind of made him go up even though he didnt want to. I didnt want him to stay with me cause he'd end up diong nothin cause I had no plans, and I know it wasnt his fault. But then he said he was going to yell at them but I didnt want that. He ended up doing it. He told me that now they realised they shouldnt. But if they apoligze to me, I don't want to hear it, becaise it wont be sincere, they'll apoligzie just because he told them to not because they realized it was wrong. The thing is, I don't know if I should be mad at it, because the people arent really friends, just aqutiances, but no one wants that to happen ykno. Meh.. watevs.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Content
It's been a chill week, so everything is pretty much chill =]
Met some new people, hung out with some great friends.
Nothing much coming till finals..
But fo now im content and greatful and thankful for my friends and family =]
Night/Peacee
Met some new people, hung out with some great friends.
Nothing much coming till finals..
But fo now im content and greatful and thankful for my friends and family =]
Night/Peacee
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover
It's so weird how we are. People say first impressions sticks with you.
But when we first meet someone, all you can get from the other person is their appearance.
So would people be naturally attracted to more attractive people? And if they're not, would they think differently of them?
I try not to do that but I subconsciously do. But before I judge I try to get to know the other person.
There's so much people who just judge right away though before the get to know someone.
I mean someone thought I listen to clasical music just by my appearance when I listen to rap since first grade..
If they really knew me, they wouldn't make that assumption.
But recently, just meeting so many people just open my eyes.
But I don't know what to think about the situation i'm in..
It seems like everything is alright on the other end, but on my end, its still hard.
With everything just popping up infront of my face, it's hard to handle.
Im starting to go backwards where I was two months ago.
Just tryna to move on.
Right now i've been listening to this song all day.
The Other Side - Burno Mars feat. Cee Lo Green & B.o.B
But when we first meet someone, all you can get from the other person is their appearance.
So would people be naturally attracted to more attractive people? And if they're not, would they think differently of them?
I try not to do that but I subconsciously do. But before I judge I try to get to know the other person.
There's so much people who just judge right away though before the get to know someone.
I mean someone thought I listen to clasical music just by my appearance when I listen to rap since first grade..
If they really knew me, they wouldn't make that assumption.
But recently, just meeting so many people just open my eyes.
But I don't know what to think about the situation i'm in..
It seems like everything is alright on the other end, but on my end, its still hard.
With everything just popping up infront of my face, it's hard to handle.
Im starting to go backwards where I was two months ago.
Just tryna to move on.
Right now i've been listening to this song all day.
The Other Side - Burno Mars feat. Cee Lo Green & B.o.B
Truth of the matter is I’m complicated
You’re as straight as they come
You go ‘bout your day, baby
While I had from the sun
Its better if you don’t understand
‘Cause you won’t know what it’s like
Until you try
You know I, I’ve been waiting on the other side
And you, all you gotta do is cross the line
I could wait a whole life time but you just gotta decide
You know I, I’ve been waiting on the other
Waiting on the other side.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Whee
I saw Jung Jae today. But recently I cant tell who he really is.
He acted nice and all happy. But then later on its opposite.
Some people can't be themselves, they just act how they think they should act.
We could of been good friends since freshman year in high school, but not anymore.
Its sad cause we could of been good friends too.
So I don't know what to think now after I saw him, I feel happy, but kind of mad at the same time.
Mehh. Time for physics :/
Damn...
My friend is hurt. She at the point where she wants her life to end.
I try to be there for her but she isn't opening up to me so I can't do anything for her.
So I try to just be there for her..makes me sad I can't do anything for her.
Wish she gets better =]
He acted nice and all happy. But then later on its opposite.
Some people can't be themselves, they just act how they think they should act.
We could of been good friends since freshman year in high school, but not anymore.
Its sad cause we could of been good friends too.
So I don't know what to think now after I saw him, I feel happy, but kind of mad at the same time.
Mehh. Time for physics :/
Damn...
My friend is hurt. She at the point where she wants her life to end.
I try to be there for her but she isn't opening up to me so I can't do anything for her.
So I try to just be there for her..makes me sad I can't do anything for her.
Wish she gets better =]
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Animal
I'm listening to Animal again..But I feel the meaning of the song it had to me is gone. Whenever I talk to her now, the feeling is different. But I guess it's a good thing to because the situation would of been hard if it did work out..meh it's cool though =]
Bad habits
Alone. Ha it sucks. Just the feeling. It might not be true but it's the feeling that gets to me.
Going back home was nice in all, but my old habits kicked it.
Laying in bed, wasting time, on the computer...
It's something that I didn't want to get back into. But now thoughts keep coming up.
This week is going to be stressful because of exams..
Alone. Not littearly but just the feeling.
But shoo, I deactivated fb..
But i'm thinking lil more..can friends overcome the feeling?
Hopefuly we'll find out this week =] ....and hopefuly we can see eachother when we're not right infront of each other outside of tate? =]
Going back home was nice in all, but my old habits kicked it.
Laying in bed, wasting time, on the computer...
It's something that I didn't want to get back into. But now thoughts keep coming up.
This week is going to be stressful because of exams..
Alone. Not littearly but just the feeling.
But shoo, I deactivated fb..
But i'm thinking lil more..can friends overcome the feeling?
Hopefuly we'll find out this week =] ....and hopefuly we can see eachother when we're not right infront of each other outside of tate? =]
Friday, November 26, 2010
Happiness
This happiness isn't the one from before
Instead of a metaphor it's straight up reality
Because the happiness I receive right now
Is from my friend
And you know who you are =]]
<3
Instead of a metaphor it's straight up reality
Because the happiness I receive right now
Is from my friend
And you know who you are =]]
<3
Monday, November 15, 2010
Wishes. Blah.
That night was the night I made a wish but some how I wish I hadn't made that wish and have everything go back to the way it was. So many relationship with close friends changed. I found out things I wish I never found out. Things happen that I wish never occurred. But wish doesn't do anything. I made a wish on the first night of snow. Right then and there represented the cold that was coming and I don't have anything warm to preserve what was once was. Soon it will be overwhelmed by coldness and slowly die..
Friday, November 12, 2010
Weird
I started this to get over what I was feeling.
Then in the middle of this, I was already done with it.
But to finish it all, I finish this up.
Hey baby girl I lost my mind
Cuz in my mind there was paradise
In paradise there was only me and you
But in reality, there's no more me and you
Don't know what to do don't know what to say
In truth, I want you in my way
Nagging me, pushing me, but behind that, taking care of me.
Baby no more we parted our ways
How badly it hurts baby I wont say
All that matters is we move on from today
Baby i'm done, goodbye I say.
All them memories i'll treasure in my heart
How painful it is baby i won't even start
I'll keep it locked up straight in my heart
Baby i'll no more intrust you the key to my heart.
After I finished this, I saw a different perceptives of things in general. Things changed from last month. It feels alienated. It's just something i'll have to adjust to cause I just gotta do it.
Then in the middle of this, I was already done with it.
But to finish it all, I finish this up.
Hey baby girl I lost my mind
Cuz in my mind there was paradise
In paradise there was only me and you
But in reality, there's no more me and you
Don't know what to do don't know what to say
In truth, I want you in my way
Nagging me, pushing me, but behind that, taking care of me.
Baby no more we parted our ways
How badly it hurts baby I wont say
All that matters is we move on from today
Baby i'm done, goodbye I say.
All them memories i'll treasure in my heart
How painful it is baby i won't even start
I'll keep it locked up straight in my heart
Baby i'll no more intrust you the key to my heart.
After I finished this, I saw a different perceptives of things in general. Things changed from last month. It feels alienated. It's just something i'll have to adjust to cause I just gotta do it.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Happinesss
I look at all these blogs.
They all the same.
Not so fun to read. Its sad.
So much people be hurting, and it hurts as much just to notice what one sees.
Having the need to comfort friends. But don't know what to do.
Having the need to comfort yourself. But don't know what to do.
Find a way to escape. Not to mars but to a world full of clouds.
There you do nothing but feel so relax.
Hoping everyone can just be happy. But there's no such thing.
But all you can do is try.
Be happy =]]
Sunday, October 31, 2010
It's Out and Done
One can care so much..
Thinks she's perfect for you.
The one that makes you happy.
The one that makes you smile.
Month by month, each surprise comes with.
But after the twelfth, it's repetitive.
So one tries to keep that spark going.
With a Rose. With a Poem. With a bracelet from the Heart.
But in the end, it becomes meaningless.
Half of twelve months after a year
It crashes. Blown up. Asdfjkl;
Don't even realize one was mistreated.
By the jokes that became reality.
Realizes that everything was too much to handle.
Feel like the weight was lifted off his chest.
But then she keeps asking for more.
And he thinks about moments, memories, he had with her.
But that little voice saids noo.
Fainting away, just gotta cut the ties.
After she said **********************************
Hell nah no more.
Reality hit. Delusion gone. Mind Clear.
It's Out and Done.
From this moment on.
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